Sunday, June 26, 2005

Geographically challenged, part....1243290 

I forgot to recount my little post-exam adventure on Friday. First of all, let me set up my state of mind: imagine a girl grinning maniacally skipping around. That was me. I was rather hysterical and irrationally elated (given how shithouse the exam was) due to a combination of relief and sleep deprivation.

Soo, after the horrendous exam, I decided to go to the state library to copy an audiobook I'm too cheap to buy. Problem: no idea where the state library was. I looked it up at Fisher before I went and all I remembered was "Macquarie Street" and something about the Botanic Gardens. I took a random bus to Town Hall, and by chance met a girl from my Ethics class who said the library was somewhere near St James station. So I walked to St James in the already-slightly-spitting rain, and find one of those city map things there. Stood there for about 5 minutes trying to decipher the map; behind me were a Francophone couple whom I declined to help because a) I'd get them more lost and b) hahaha suffer. I managed to get to the Aquatic Centre edge of Hyde Park, where I found another map I didn't understand. In my lalalla-with-the-fairies-burst-into-song state, I thought it'd be brilliant to just have a wander around and hopefully, you know, bump into the state library, so I set off with an assured step- in the wrong direction. I think this woman was following me because I was walking so confidently, which was a bad idea because I ended up leading her in a circle around St Andrew's or St Mary's or something. Being the idiot I am, I was too embarassed to turn around once I knew I was lost so just continued walking in the rain nonchalantly. Finally, got back to where I started, and went back towards the museum (wrong directiona gain). Walked past this square where a "Festival of Faith" was being set up or taken down, and a couple of tour buses with drivers who I'm sure were mocking me, the bastards. Luckily, I came across another map which I FINALLY figured out, so I did an about-face with a whole "oh I meant to do this all along" attitude. Half-drenched by now, and not so cheery, I ended up going inside St Mary's out of curiosity. The first church I've been inside since like, high school. There were only these Asian tourists in there taking illegal photos of the altar ("here's me and THE BLEEDING JESUS"), a sanctimonious caretaker dude shooing said tourists, and an amusing copy of the Pieta. Strange, I'm usually affected by the calm of churches, but this one had no effect on me- I blame it on the tasteful down-lighting. I contemplated buying a candle for a buck, but the sanctimonious caretaker blew them all out before I could, so I just sat in a pew trying to understand religion and failing. I did end up donating 20c though. Funny, that, since I pretended I didn't have any change to a homeless woman who asked me later. Oh well, going to hell anyway.

Afterward, made myself across the Botanic Gardens trying to cover my head from bird poo, since there were all these strangely terrifying little black birds (or bats?) swooping around like some staged Shakespearean omen. I ended u at the back of the state library, where I discovered the homeless hangout, distinctive by its stink of beer and piles and piles of cardboard boxes. Inside the library, I puttered around working out the locker system and the protocol for requesting books and getting a card and using the wifi- it's all very complicated and inimidating, I swear, I had to bumble around looking nonchalant again to look for the bloody request desk.

So you've been waiting for the punchline- here it is: the book I was looking for wasn't there. After all that. So spent the next couple of hours surfing on the slowest wifi ever until mum called telling me to get to Chinatown. Had no idea how to get to Chinatown, but somehow found my way to Martin Place. The rain was torrential at this point, and the cool misty spray of the afternoon was becoming cold and pellet-like and my mood had sunk from "let's go kiss strangers" to "fuck yourself up a tree, ho".

But wait, there's more. At David Jones, I caught an unfamiliar bus and overshot Chinatown, ending up at UTS. Being too cheap to buy a ticket back and too tarded to find the right bus stop, I walked back in said torrential rain. I swear, it never rains in Sydney, it pours. Passing buses driving in puddles would send up a spray like five meters wide, I swear. I made it to Chinatown looking like a drowned rat, about half an hour late but still had to wait for the guest of honour, stepdork's brother whose birthday it was.

Guess you had to be there. Shit, that was a long and boring story. Forgive me.

# posted at 4:32 pm

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